The phrase “Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to act” comes from Proverbs 3:27. As a Christian, how do we interpret this responsibility, and what does it mean? How do we know when it is within our power to act?
What is Good?
When it comes to helping people, it can be broken down into several categories: financial and material help, kindness and encouragement, or justice and fairness.
Financial and material help can be money or food or resources. Maybe you have been blessed with knowledge about something and you can share it with others. Or you have financial resources that you are willing to give to help others out. These provide you with opportunities to be on the lookout for ways to give out of the blessings you’ve received.
Kindness and encouragement may be free for us to give, but they do require time and effort to be truly meaningful. In this way, they are a finite resource, and can be even more valuable at certain times than financial or material gifts. Even when we are admonishing or disciplining others, I believe it is important to be kind in how we approach other people.
Praying for someone is another way that we can show kindness, and reaching out to let them know they are in our prayers can encourage their soul. Prayer is powerful and helps set our hearts and minds correctly, but it is not a substitute for practical action either. Don’t let yourself only pray: pray and then take action within your capabilities.
Justice and fairness refers to your ability to use your influence or authority to advocate for someone who is being treated unjustly. It means that you are aware of what is happening to people around you and you are spotting those who are weak and vulnerable and being exploited. You may not be able to change their circumstances, but being willing to advocate and help can show kindness and encourage someone in need.
When is Someone “Due” Good?
Someone may be worthy of good if they have a rightful claim to it – whether by justice, merit or need. Here are some ways to understand what makes a person worthy of receiving good:
1. By Justice (Obligation or Fairness)
We see in James 5:4 that when someone works for you, they deserve wages in compensation. Those who serve you in some way are worthy of respect, wages, and your consideration.
Look! The wages you failed to pay the workers who mowed your fields are crying out against you. The cries of the harvesters have reached the ears of the Lord Almighty.
In addition, if you have borrowed from someone or owe them a debt, or if you committed yourself to act in some way, you should honor your commitment. As Christians, we know that God values integrity, and Jesus says, “Let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No, ‘No.'” (Matthew 5:37, James 5:12). What we say we will do matters, as it says in Ecclesiastes 5:4-5, “It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay.”
Romans 13:7 Give to everyone what you owe them: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor.
If someone has shown you kindness, then gratitude and kindness is due to them.
Luke 17:17-18 Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?”
In each of these examples, we can see that justice requires us to give others good when they are owed it.
2. By Merit (Deserving Due to Character or Effort)
Jesus humbled himself and served others, going so far as to wash their feet and ultimately give his life to cover our sins. When we follow in Christ’s footsteps and serve each other with humility and grace, we can also earn double honor, as it says in 1 Timothy 5:17:
The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honor, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching.
People who serve in these positions are giving up their time and energy to serve Jesus and each other, and when we are able to give them good in return, the are deserving of it.
Along the same lines, those who are skilled in their work and who provide a valuable service are worthy of our attention. This is the basis of commerce, since we will pay people to perform their skill for us, such as when you hire someone to work on your house, or commission an artist to create a work of art.
Proverbs 22:29 Do you see someone skilled in their work?
They will serve before kings;
they will not serve before officials of low rank.
Another area to keep in mind are those people around you who are serving or volunteering their time and effort in some manner, or serving as a missionary either abroad or at home.
Those who have shown generosity and kindness are also worthy of receiving it in return, as Matthew 5:7 states, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.”
3. By Need (Compassion and Generosity)
Those who have a genuine need of our goodness are also worthy of being shown kindness and generosity. These people may not fall into the previous two categories, but are worthy simply because of their great need.
Proverbs 14:31 Whoever oppresses the poor shows contempt for their Maker,
but whoever is kind to the needy honors God.
Showing kindness and providing good to the needy shows you value them because of who created them. God cares about every person, so we as Christians also should care about them.
Even those who we consider our enemies may be worthy of our goodness and kindness, as Luke 6:35 says, “But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.”
When we do good to others and don’t expect something in return, God will repay our kindness and goodness in due time.
Worthiness, in this context, is not about personal preference but about recognizing legitimate claims – whether moral, relational, or societal – and responding with integrity and generosity.
When Should We Not do Good?
While the Bible encourages generosity and justice, there are situations where withholding good may be appropriate. Our time and money are not infinite resources, and so we do need to prioritize and withhold our “goodness” at times simply because we cannot meet all the needs of the world.
The following list of reasons also provide some guidelines for determining how we can spot opportunities to avoid spoiling our kindness and goodness on those who may deserve it less than others.
1. Lack of Integrity or Wrong Motives
If a person is clearly trying to manipulate or deceptively exploit your generosity, then you can re-evaluate if it’s a good idea to continue to encourage their deception. While we are called to even love our enemies, that may mean cutting them off so that they find their own way as well.
The Bible also encourages hard work and warns against laziness. If someone is using your kindness and goodness to avoid taking responsibility for themselves when they are fully capable of doing so, then it may be a kindness to stop enabling their laziness (2 Thessalonians 3:10).
2. Destructive Behavior
Proverbs repeatedly warns against enabling a fool: “Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the wisdom of your words” – Proverbs 23:9. Calling someone a fool is a serious accusation, but it is important for us as Christians to be able to identify the characteristics of a fool.
A fool is someone who 1) Rejects God (Psalm 14:1), 2) Despises Wisdom and Instruction (Proverbs 1:7), 3) Is Quick to Speak and Slow to Listen (Ecclesiastes 10:14), 4) Lacks Self-Control (Proverbs 29:11), 5) Repeats Mistakes (Proverbs 26:11), 6) Trusts in Himself (Proverbs 28:26), 7) Spreads Strife and Dishonor (Proverbs 10:18), 8) Does Not Fear Consequences (Proverbs 14:16), 9) Mocks Sin (Proverbs 14:9), 10) Is Not Worthy of Honor (Proverbs 26:1).
While we all do foolish things from time to time, a true fool does not see their folly. They continually exist in their foolishness and resist all attempts to seek wisdom.
3. Lack of Repentance or Accountability
Similar to the fool who is stuck in their foolishness, if someone refuses correction and continues in wrongdoing, rewarding them may reinforce bad behavior (Proverbs 26:11). You may need to make a distinction from someone who is trying to change but is stuck in a destructive behavior like addiction, where they are making good faith efforts to change but at times get sucked back in.
Their efforts are worthy of being rewarded, while acknowledging with humility that all of us struggle with addictions and vices. It is also important to note that we shouldn’t withhold goodness to be manipulative ourselves. If we are trying to control people through our kindness and goodness, then we may be guilty of destructive behavior ourselves. We may be wise to withhold money from a drug addict, but we can still be kind about how we seek to show we care.
Another time we may withhold from someone is if they are unwilling to resolve offenses. Jesus teaches reconciliation before offerings: “First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” (Matthew 5:23-24). If someone is unwilling to reconcile, it shows there is bitterness and resentment in their hearts. Attempting to show them kindness or goodness may even stoke their bitterness and resentment. Waiting for God to soften their hearts may be the best course of action.
4. When Giving Would Cause Harm
The phrase “First do no harm” may apply in this case, where constantly bailing someone out could prevent them from learning responsibility. Proverbs 19:19 warns, “A man of great wrath will pay the penalty, for if you deliver him, you will only have to do it again.”
In a similar vein, Jesus warns us about giving valuable things to those who will not appreciate them, and trample them underfoot.
Matthew 7:6 “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.
The key principle in all of these cases is discernment – helping when it leads to true good, but not when it enables harm, laziness or unrighteousness.
Summary
It is our obligation as Christians to seek to do good to those whom it is due, through our actions, our words, and our thoughts and prayers. We should seek to be aware of people around us who are due our “good,” and use discernment to know what form our “good” should take. Everyone you come into contact with each day could receive some good from you – a smile to a stranger, a compliment to your spouse, food for someone who is hungry.
When we all seek to do the good of those around us, we will encourage peace and love and God’s goodness in our world.
